Two Legends of "DIY Home Improvement" – Ed Gein vs. Jeffrey Dahmer

Twisted
Feb 25
3 min read

Updated: Feb 26

Welcome back to the dark side of novelty, where we celebrate the kind of history that makes you question if humanity peaked with indoor plumbing... or if we peaked with guys who turned "making it work" into a felony-level art project.

We're pitting two Wisconsin icons against each other in the ultimate "who had the worse interior decorating taste?" showdown: Ed Gein, the original Plainfield Ghoul, and Jeffrey Dahmer, Milwaukee's most infamous fridge organizer.

Famous Wisconsin Serial Killer Ed Gein — Ed Gein

Wisconsin serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer mugshot — Jeffrey Dahmer

Let's start with Ed Gein – the man who literally invented "skin in the game." Ed didn't kill a ton of people (only confirmed two murders), but he made up for quantity with quality craftsmanship. Grave-robbing was his side hustle, and he turned human remains into the ultimate Etsy finds: lampshades from faces, a belt of nipples (because who needs a wallet when you can have fashion?), bowls from skulls, and even a full-body suit made of skin. Yes, he wanted to become his dead mother. Therapy wasn't invented yet, apparently.

Hey, do you know why Ed Gein opposed new laws on creepy behavior? He had skin in the game! Or how about this gem – his mattress? Mammary foam. (We'll see ourselves out.)

Fast-forward a few decades to Jeffrey Dahmer, the guy who took "meal prep" to Olympic levels. Jeff wasn't into arts and crafts as much as he was into... preservation. Seventeen victims later, his apartment looked like a rejected episode of Hoarders: Bodies Edition. He drilled holes in heads to create "zombies," kept heads in the fridge (because nothing says "welcome home" like a smiling skull staring at your leftovers), and experimented with acid baths and cannibal cuisine. His fridge was basically a charcuterie board from hell – finger foods, anyone?

A grill full of meat — Tastes like chicken!

Did you know that when police raided Dahmer's place, they found him by the fridge singing, "My bologna has a first name..." (It's J-E-F-F-R-E-Y, obviously.)

So how do they stack up in the twisted hall of fame?

Kill count: Dahmer wins (17 vs. Ed's 2 confirmed). But Ed was more of a recycler – efficiency points for sustainability.
Creativity: Ed takes the crown. Dahmer was more "mad scientist"; Ed was full-on "Martha Stewart gone feral."
Catchphrase potential: Ed inspired Buffalo Bill's "It puts the lotion on its skin" line. Dahmer got the Netflix miniseries and a killer fridge aesthetic. Edge to Jeff for cultural impact.
Puns per crime: Ed edges it with the skin/furniture wordplay. Dahmer's are mostly fridge and "long pig" jokes.

Bottom line: Both proved that if you're going to be a monster, at least commit to the bit. One turned people into furniture; the other turned them into... snacks. Either way, they gave "personal space" a whole new meaning.

Moral of the story? If your neighbor has a suspiciously quiet basement and a weird smell, maybe don't borrow their lotion. Or their fridge.And if you're the type who appreciates this level of dark absurdity (no judgment – we built an entire shop around it), check out our tribute tees before someone tries to turn them into lampshades:

Ed Gein – Put On A Happy Face Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee – Because a permanent grin is just a few stitches away.

Buffalo Bill's Body Lotion Ed Gein Silence of the Lambs Unisex Cotton Tee - Or get the hose again.

Jeffrey Dahmer – Live. Laugh. Lobotomize. Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee – Self-care, Dahmer style.

Jeffrey Dahmer – Eat. Pray. Love. Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee – Right to the point.